Complex Personality » Honouring yourself effect

Every decision I make which is closer to my true self makes me feel stronger and happier.

Not instantly, first day is the feeling of guilt that I am disappointing someone. Although I logically know I am not responsible for fulfilling the needs of people who cross my path, still there is this uncomfortable sensation: “Why I just don’t want to cooperate?”. And then the thought comes “Because I was cooperating, easy-going and selfless person for the most of my life and it left me drained from energy to form my own goals. So, if I am not happy later, who is there to blame ?

I still have friends and acquittances trying to oblige me to give them myself piece by piece, because this is how they use to operate (not knowing better way by far).

As with the saying “if you are a giver, you need to know your boundaries, because the takers don’t have any”. I felt that.

There will be always people around us for whom keeping the status quo is comfortable, it’s not in their interest if you change your response and choose yourself for once. “Why are you so selfish, why are you ruining everything??” - In the relationships...

It is especially difficult to change the dynamics in the family of origin. For years every member had a role there and didn’t have to think about it, so if you rattle the cage, nobody will like that.

Let’s be honest, nobody likes change and it is unsettling for the people in your environment. Do not expect support “oh, you start recognising your true needs now, Bravo!, we will support you in that”

People were used to see you in a certain way, and now they will have to learn the new evolved You.

It’s a work, and everyone prefers rather to focus on what they have on their plate, we do not welcome with joy any additional tasks.

That’s why shout out to everyone in your environment who will welcome new You with curiosity – cherish those connections! 😊

Sometimes the empathy from your surrounding will not be possible because your new way of behaving touches the cord in them, which they decided many years ago not to touch.

It might be that they have buried an important piece of themselves to have “calm and peace” and you remind them of that – this naturally evokes resistance. Oftentimes we don’t want to meet with our past. There might be regret, feeling of guilt or shame, that we prefer to cover with the smile in everyday life and “ I’m tough” attitude instead of facing the ghosts.

That is why starting this path to your true self will not be necessary welcomed with enthusiasm from your family or people who knew your “adapted self”. However, it will be rewarded with new energy to DO things in your life and also more creative power to change your circumstances (in case you are not exactly happy from where you are right now).

It will be worth it.. and quite soon.

There is an amazing feeling of empowerment that is difficult to describe, but I would wish it to everyone who feels that is in the hopeless situation right now. This empowerment comes from embracing and honouring your true nature.

From this point, like with magic everything starts to fall into right place. Right people start crossing your path. Some of them will help you with your new goals, other will inspire you to achieve various goals on your own and suddenly opportunities that you thought are not for you will start appearing in your life. Simply as a consequence of the fact that you are loyal to yourself and how you were meant to be before you started adapting too much to “fit in”.

The courage to jump into this reality paid off for me in the way I didn’t imagine.

Moved me from fear to LOVE for people.

And from that space everything became possible.

with Love,